So often it is our thinking that holds us back rather than lack of intellect, ability or aptitude. Fear of failure and fear of rejection are the two greatest reasons that people do not experience the success and happiness they crave.
Fear of failure is a major obstacle to us enjoying the success we desire in a variety of different areas in our lives. Fear that we will not get what we want, will not succeed in the way we wish or that we fear we might be judged as ‘not very good’, stop us from even venturing a serious attempt. We can become pre-occupied with not making any mistakes, and with seeking approval and reassurance from others.
The antidote is to find the courage to face a fear and take some action. Perhaps start with a small one, experiencing that sweet feeling of inner satisfaction when our courage pays off. With each small success, courage grows and soon even greater success looms.
Equally, a fear of rejection interferes with performance and inhibits expression. 99 percent of adults experience both these fears of failure and rejection. In the continual inner dialogue of ‘I cant but I have to’ and ‘I have to but I cant’, they are caught in a downward spiral of negativity focused on themselves.
The antidote to these fears is growth in courage, character and self-esteem. The opposite of fear is actually love, self-love and self-respect. Would you speak to someone you love the way you speak to yourself? Acting with courage in a fearful situation is a simple technique that boosts our regard for ourselves to such a degree that our fears subside and lose their ability to affect our behaviour and decisions in a negative manner. It may be time to think of yourself as a valuable and important person and bear in mind of course, that if you do not try you cannot fail but neither can you ever succeed.
Angela